Living the moment

I've been thinking about this a lot lately.

For the first few years of my kids life, i used to kind of wish the time away. I felt like life was just too hard at the moment, and i wanted them to grow up so things might be easier. Looking back, these are some of the precious times, when they can't yell at you, walk away, make a disgusting mess etc etc.

Now i'm feeling so much better, i wish the opposite, i want to go back and experience those moments again, with mental health! I also find myself wishing that they wouldn't grow up. Sure, they can be challenging, but also SOOOO georgous that i just can't stand the thought of them changing.

I want to hang on to every moment and memory, photographing, scrapbooking, blogging, however I can.
I find this emotionally draining. And it's hard to fully enjoy a moment, when you're trying so hard to remember it, and having a feeling of nostalgia already, worrying that you'll forget.

I need to learn to live in the moment, accepting that there will be good and bad at every stage and age of life. Sure, there are things to hold on to, memories and sensations, but not everything, the human brain is just not that big! Spending time with the people that are precious to me as they are now is the most important thing. It's nice to remember things, but not essential to happiness, there's enough to deal with in the here and now.

this is a huge challenge for me, to live without regret, to fully immerse myself in the present. wish me luck